Ahhh sorry for the previous post as you can tell I was wasted and drunk! Not that I don't always want S. attention but sometimes (I know this is hard to believe, hehe) I am an attention whore with him, hehe! Example, I got pretty drunk this weekend (God, I love 4 day weekends) and he went to a bar with a friend (down the street) but here is the kicker didn't mention he was going so here me and my friends are at this house and my fiance and my friends husband apparently just took a walk. Uhhh ok normal sober Me would just get ahold of him make sure he is ok and go on with my bad self....but drunk Me gets mad goes to the bar has a shot and then goes to another bar without them and telling S. to make a point. Then I come back and proceed to argue with him till I pass out. Now the weird thing is I do care that he doesn't tell me where he is going....the night before he thought i had left the party we were at and got worried, but apparently it is ok for him to leave. I guess the booze basically ruins my delivery. I get irritated at him and myself for different reasons. With him it feels like a double standards sometimes. Its ok for him but not for me, but i do the same thing as well. Ahhh apparently i had called up an ex that night I got pissed at S. as well. I didn't meet up and have would not have done anything but it is so childish for me to like call this guy I know likes me still and use him to make me feel better. SHIT, I need to grow up, not drink so much, or lock S. in a closet for only me to take out (as needed).
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