Holy shit it has been way to long since I have posted and for anyone who still might be reading this I apoligize. Well lets do some updates shall we.
I started my new job and thus far it is fabulous. I have a new car, computer, the works. Only thing that sucks is the home study. I feel like I am back in grad school studying the shit out of drugs and human anatomy. Luckily my genetics background seems to help. My coworkers that I have met so far seem really cool and like me. Talkative open people who are driven. My boss is great not a micromanager bitch like my college department head where I am teaching. That is a whole other story.
The last day at my other job was great. More than 50 people showed up for my happy hour, which made me feel cool and I got extremely drunk without spending a cent. We then went to the strip club and I got a great lapdance. I literally closed my eyes and just felt the hot stripper on me. Not to sound to weird but I can understand why men love it. Women are so soft to the touch and feel amazing.....I think the booze got to me, hehehe
The wedding season and crazy shit started last weekend. Basically every weekend I have either weddings, showers, bachelorette parties or shit going on. I have become a little obsessive about looking at my registry (yes I am one of those women I hate, but be rest assured I don't bore others with wedding talk)
I had the best sex last night can I just tell you! Talk about hot all around the room, upside down, every which way hot sex. I really needed it with all the stress so even though S will never read this thank you for being such a hot lay after 5 years.
Well back to studying and being lame but rest assure I am going to start posting more regulary now that I have my own computer through work (cannot have S. find me out).
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Karma, rain and the bus
So this past week my fiancé and family have been carting me around like I was a child since my beater of a car crapped out on me. You seriously do not realize how much you need and utilize your car until you need tampons and it is raining like a monsoon outside.
This Saturday I was determined to make it to the Stop and Stop a couple of miles up the street to get feminine products and stuff for lunch during the week (do not have a car to go get anything), but of course when I look outside it is raining buckets. OH well that is not going to stop my mission. My mission to show everyone that I am no yuppie suburbanite who cannot take a bus or walk some where! So I log onto the local bus transit to see which line I should take and can I tell you something crazy? Bus schedules are the most confusing fucking shit ever! Yes, I have a college and graduate degree, yes I work as a biomedical engineer and yet I can’t figure out a simple diagram of different buses. Oh and of course after I figure it out I realize it is the line for during the week and I had to start all over.
Ok I know where the bus comes, what time it comes and when I need to get it back, so I grab my umbrella and go outside to wait. Can you believe in my head I kept thinking “Don’t look like a homeless person?” Uhhh I almost hit myself! In my head I am thinking, when did I become this snot….I don’t even own a car! Well Karma knew I was thinking horrible thoughts and brought a huge SUV by my bus stop and drove through a huge puddle which covered me! Honestly I deserved it for acting so self righteous that minute.
So 5 minutes go by and I am soaked, I mean up to my knees soaked and it was not a nice warm summery trickle but a freezing bone chilling “Little women” Beth dying of pneumonia rain. I am chattering my teeth when low and behold I see the bus coming from the opposite direction and not stopping! I run, chase and scream after this bus, while I look like a soaked 5’10’ inch rat and my umbrella broke. I was left there on the corner with no umbrella, and no bus. FUCK!
I was defeated and I knew it. I am a slave to technology and luxury and when I say luxury I mean a 1995 Mazda protégé which has tons of dents but always brought me where I needed to go. So I walked across the street to get some wine and booze and as I was walking back I realized why having a brown bag over your booze was a good thing in the rain.
This Saturday I was determined to make it to the Stop and Stop a couple of miles up the street to get feminine products and stuff for lunch during the week (do not have a car to go get anything), but of course when I look outside it is raining buckets. OH well that is not going to stop my mission. My mission to show everyone that I am no yuppie suburbanite who cannot take a bus or walk some where! So I log onto the local bus transit to see which line I should take and can I tell you something crazy? Bus schedules are the most confusing fucking shit ever! Yes, I have a college and graduate degree, yes I work as a biomedical engineer and yet I can’t figure out a simple diagram of different buses. Oh and of course after I figure it out I realize it is the line for during the week and I had to start all over.
Ok I know where the bus comes, what time it comes and when I need to get it back, so I grab my umbrella and go outside to wait. Can you believe in my head I kept thinking “Don’t look like a homeless person?” Uhhh I almost hit myself! In my head I am thinking, when did I become this snot….I don’t even own a car! Well Karma knew I was thinking horrible thoughts and brought a huge SUV by my bus stop and drove through a huge puddle which covered me! Honestly I deserved it for acting so self righteous that minute.
So 5 minutes go by and I am soaked, I mean up to my knees soaked and it was not a nice warm summery trickle but a freezing bone chilling “Little women” Beth dying of pneumonia rain. I am chattering my teeth when low and behold I see the bus coming from the opposite direction and not stopping! I run, chase and scream after this bus, while I look like a soaked 5’10’ inch rat and my umbrella broke. I was left there on the corner with no umbrella, and no bus. FUCK!
I was defeated and I knew it. I am a slave to technology and luxury and when I say luxury I mean a 1995 Mazda protégé which has tons of dents but always brought me where I needed to go. So I walked across the street to get some wine and booze and as I was walking back I realized why having a brown bag over your booze was a good thing in the rain.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Need some control
I don't know what it was but today at the Business Unit Meeting this morning I almost jumped across a bunch of engineers to punch a "planning" asshole boss in his face.
Nahh not really but I got so fucking heated that I left the meeting. Sometimes just sometimes I want to rip apart certain people who work in my company.
Long story short Planning was upset that a product was not on time. Now if we were making pens, or a toy truck I can understand the demand to rush things through....but we make SUTURES and biomedical equipment.
So I ask?
Do you want me to rush the batch of absorbable sutures that will be inserted into your overweight wife when she gets her stomach tied up?
Good sir, would you like to forgoe the quality of a staple that will go into your bratty only child's heart?
Hmmmmm would you like me to just pass a crappy bowel ring so your bile from your stomach falls into your intestines? Actually this douchebag would deserve it.
He wasn't even directing it toward me, but the snarky attitude he had made me want to scream "GO FUCK YOURSELF you retard!" but instead like a good little corporate droid who does not want to burn bridges (only 3 more days to go) I left the meeting pretending having to go to the bathroom. Plus I think I saved myself from being arrested.
Nahh not really but I got so fucking heated that I left the meeting. Sometimes just sometimes I want to rip apart certain people who work in my company.
Long story short Planning was upset that a product was not on time. Now if we were making pens, or a toy truck I can understand the demand to rush things through....but we make SUTURES and biomedical equipment.
So I ask?
Do you want me to rush the batch of absorbable sutures that will be inserted into your overweight wife when she gets her stomach tied up?
Good sir, would you like to forgoe the quality of a staple that will go into your bratty only child's heart?
Hmmmmm would you like me to just pass a crappy bowel ring so your bile from your stomach falls into your intestines? Actually this douchebag would deserve it.
He wasn't even directing it toward me, but the snarky attitude he had made me want to scream "GO FUCK YOURSELF you retard!" but instead like a good little corporate droid who does not want to burn bridges (only 3 more days to go) I left the meeting pretending having to go to the bathroom. Plus I think I saved myself from being arrested.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Keep telling myself over and over...
ONE MORE WEEK...don't kill anyone or go postal. You can do it! One more week.
On a different note I had a great relaxing weekend pretty much movies, wine and sex. It was nice but I felt like I was 15 again asking for a ride from my friend. So tonight I have to teach my class and hopefully not kill any of my students either. Why oh why do I have to do all this shit for a wedding. Eloping is sounding better and better everyday.
On a different note I had a great relaxing weekend pretty much movies, wine and sex. It was nice but I felt like I was 15 again asking for a ride from my friend. So tonight I have to teach my class and hopefully not kill any of my students either. Why oh why do I have to do all this shit for a wedding. Eloping is sounding better and better everyday.
Thursday, March 6, 2008
My major flaw
It is time to share my flaws with my fellow bloggers. I do have them even though my life is so perfect (HAHA, hope you got the sarcasm in that) but I am plagued with pitfalls like everyone else. I believe my biggest flaw is also my biggest savior. Let me explain…
My biggest flaw has two parts
A. I talk a lot
B. I am open about everything
When I say I talk a lot, I do…I can’t help myself, I feel all of these thoughts racing through my head a million miles a minute and I can’t help letting them all spill out like word vomit. I can’t write as well or as fast as I can speak. This does not always make for a bad situation because even though I talk a lot I talk with humor and hopefully (not all the time) intelligence. With me around there is no awkward moment on a date, at a party, etc. I just keep the conversation going with open ended questions. I am sure for my fiancé, family and friends who have been around me for years and have to interact with me more than a couple hours this can be annoying.
I have had to learn that in the morning S. just can’t function with thoughts for about an hour. He can grunt, scratch, and eat but thought process and speaking skills seem to be devoid. At first when you are all infatuated and in love I would worry “Oh my god is it me?” “Is he getting tired of me already?” Of course over the years this has dissipated and I have to control myself to not jam pack my poor fiancé’s head with jibber jabber (did I just say that, hehe) until a little later.
As for the second part of the flaw I have definitely been open to people maybe I shouldn’t have. I figure that by being open with everything I never get in trouble, give the wrong impression and people know who and what I stand for, but you and I both know some people have really rigid, conservative ways and unfortunately I am the person who will make them feel the most uncomfortable. I just can’t comprehend not speaking your mind, or being closed off. I feel less anxiety, stress, problems, etc not only with my fiancé, family, but life. I have a crazy open communication with the people I love because I force them to be that way since I am. I do wish sometimes I wasn’t so open because I have definitely felt like an ass. Example of the following “foot way down in the back of throat” syndrome
Background of scene: Went over to a friend’ house (In college) and waiting in dining area with mother. I have not seen my friend or his family in a while.
After a typical how are you doing conversation she asks where I am working?
Me: “Oh, I work at the Mall in the salad, smoothie bar which is a great thing because it reminds me why I am in school.”
Mother: “Do a lot of people from our town work there?”
Me: “Oh yeah I work with a bunch of loser skanky girls from our town, who got knocked up an ruined their life before the age of 20, again another constant reminder of why I have to do something with my life and not disappoint my parents.”
Right at that moment my friend’s sister who is 19 comes around the corner knocked up and looking pretty skanky.
I must have looked so dumbfounded and embarrassed because all I can do was stutter over myself.
Me: “Oh well, you must be, uhhh different than those girls…you aren’t skanky in the least bit, uhhh got to go, great seeing you.”
My friend could not stop making fun of me the whole night and I have never gone over that house again.
My biggest flaw has two parts
A. I talk a lot
B. I am open about everything
When I say I talk a lot, I do…I can’t help myself, I feel all of these thoughts racing through my head a million miles a minute and I can’t help letting them all spill out like word vomit. I can’t write as well or as fast as I can speak. This does not always make for a bad situation because even though I talk a lot I talk with humor and hopefully (not all the time) intelligence. With me around there is no awkward moment on a date, at a party, etc. I just keep the conversation going with open ended questions. I am sure for my fiancé, family and friends who have been around me for years and have to interact with me more than a couple hours this can be annoying.
I have had to learn that in the morning S. just can’t function with thoughts for about an hour. He can grunt, scratch, and eat but thought process and speaking skills seem to be devoid. At first when you are all infatuated and in love I would worry “Oh my god is it me?” “Is he getting tired of me already?” Of course over the years this has dissipated and I have to control myself to not jam pack my poor fiancé’s head with jibber jabber (did I just say that, hehe) until a little later.
As for the second part of the flaw I have definitely been open to people maybe I shouldn’t have. I figure that by being open with everything I never get in trouble, give the wrong impression and people know who and what I stand for, but you and I both know some people have really rigid, conservative ways and unfortunately I am the person who will make them feel the most uncomfortable. I just can’t comprehend not speaking your mind, or being closed off. I feel less anxiety, stress, problems, etc not only with my fiancé, family, but life. I have a crazy open communication with the people I love because I force them to be that way since I am. I do wish sometimes I wasn’t so open because I have definitely felt like an ass. Example of the following “foot way down in the back of throat” syndrome
Background of scene: Went over to a friend’ house (In college) and waiting in dining area with mother. I have not seen my friend or his family in a while.
After a typical how are you doing conversation she asks where I am working?
Me: “Oh, I work at the Mall in the salad, smoothie bar which is a great thing because it reminds me why I am in school.”
Mother: “Do a lot of people from our town work there?”
Me: “Oh yeah I work with a bunch of loser skanky girls from our town, who got knocked up an ruined their life before the age of 20, again another constant reminder of why I have to do something with my life and not disappoint my parents.”
Right at that moment my friend’s sister who is 19 comes around the corner knocked up and looking pretty skanky.
I must have looked so dumbfounded and embarrassed because all I can do was stutter over myself.
Me: “Oh well, you must be, uhhh different than those girls…you aren’t skanky in the least bit, uhhh got to go, great seeing you.”
My friend could not stop making fun of me the whole night and I have never gone over that house again.
Monday, March 3, 2008
Just remember before the good must come....
Sometimes I feel like God, Buddha, Siddartha, Allah or whoever is up there likes to fuck around with me a bit…nothing horrible but always reminds me to keep a level head.
I have this amazing crazy time right now between the new job, teaching, and wedding shit that I feel pulled in two but this weekend was very ironic to say the least. I got my wedding dress and it is gorgeous and makes me feel amazing but two weeks before my new job my shit box car decides to shit the bed. What the fuck! Seriously two weeks before I get a new car!
So here I am reverting back to 15 and calling people and coordinating rides. It’s so weird not having a car because until you don’t have one you never really appreciate how much you use one. I actually forgot for a second that I didn’t have one and said to S. “I am going to get alcohol tonight”…. walked out into the parking lot and then looked around like a confused senile old lady until I realized I was car less. Luckily the liquor store is less than a block away! I felt like a homeless alcoholic walking home in the dark with a brown paper bag. (Side note: why the hell did my fiancé not offer to come and carry his own damn microbrew?)
On a different note need to remind myself over and over again that 3 martinis, 4 glasses of wine and two shots may seem fun in the beginning but your need to vomit will over take that fun. Lying on the floor of your bathroom is not acceptable at 26.Please say this over and over to yourself….
I have this amazing crazy time right now between the new job, teaching, and wedding shit that I feel pulled in two but this weekend was very ironic to say the least. I got my wedding dress and it is gorgeous and makes me feel amazing but two weeks before my new job my shit box car decides to shit the bed. What the fuck! Seriously two weeks before I get a new car!
So here I am reverting back to 15 and calling people and coordinating rides. It’s so weird not having a car because until you don’t have one you never really appreciate how much you use one. I actually forgot for a second that I didn’t have one and said to S. “I am going to get alcohol tonight”…. walked out into the parking lot and then looked around like a confused senile old lady until I realized I was car less. Luckily the liquor store is less than a block away! I felt like a homeless alcoholic walking home in the dark with a brown paper bag. (Side note: why the hell did my fiancé not offer to come and carry his own damn microbrew?)
On a different note need to remind myself over and over again that 3 martinis, 4 glasses of wine and two shots may seem fun in the beginning but your need to vomit will over take that fun. Lying on the floor of your bathroom is not acceptable at 26.Please say this over and over to yourself….
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