Life. What life?

Whew life has been going in full speed for me lately…and believe me the bags under my eyes show it all. Over the last two weeks I have not had more than two minutes of free time and that is taken up by showers and going to the bathroom.

Let’s see a over view of why my life is so ridiculous from a typical week of mine.

Monday: Wake up at 5:45am to go to the gym (which the doctor allows me to only swim or cycle) and then off to work for 8am. I have been working a lot harder these days, not by choice but ever since two colleagues of mine quit (smart assholes) I am next in line for big projects. I have had to actually work as opposed to writing in my blog and searching the internet. From work I drive to my class for 5:20pm. Then I teach and give a lab. I don’t get out of the lab room until 9:50pm and the commute is 45 mins home so I prance in the door about 10:45 pm. This is when I make dinner and try to catch up with my fiancé. Proceed to sex and then sleep at midnight.

Tuesday: Wake up at 6:45 am and get to work for 8pm. Then I go to the gym after work, but then I work on grading and the next lecture for class. I didn’t get to bed until 1:30 am (probably shouldn’t of had sex at 1am either but what the hell!). I couldn’t even watch Nip/Tuck with my girls which pisses me off because there is nothing than a big bottle of red, Christian troy and bitching about life with my fabulous ladies.

Wednesday: Wake up at 6:45am go to work. Horrible weather always makes me want to kill myself on my daily commute. People drive like maniacs and then wonder how they spun out of control and get into an accident. Everyone else is subjected to slow commute and then there are the assholes who don’t follow the blatant signs that state “Left lane closed two miles up due to accident” NO instead of merging those fucking assholes keep driving forward until they get to the accident, force themselves into the lanes where other intelligent people already merged with no fucking problem. I make every effort to be that bitch and not let any of them in. Seriously traffic wouldn’t be as bad if you just merged two mile back! End of that rant….hehe.



Thursday: Woke up a little late for work, but it wasn’t too crazy yesterday and I actually did nothing but exciting laundry, went to the gym (which was curiously busy for a Thursday night at 8pm), did a little grocery shopping, and then made some dinner, while cleaning the bathroom, and taking a shower. I watched a little TV (I have a love hate relationship with “Lost” the show) and passed out at 11:30pm.

Friday: I wake up to a slight snow storm (always fun since I never watch the news and always get surprised) and now I am trying to catch up with my blogging. Then after work I am going for one drink at happy hour, picking up the fiancé to attend a opera with Mamma dukes, and then going to bed sober (hopefully).

For the weekend I have to make two lectures, get my hair done (haven’t done anything to my hair in 9 months and it shows) grade some quizzes, keep working on the loads of laundry we have, study for my interview on Monday (took the day off but somehow I agreed to do it at 8:30 am even though it is 40 minutes away, WTF is wrong with me) and then go to a dinner party. Don’t get me wrong my life is fabulous but I haven’t even been able to drink at all. I seriously just realized I haven’t had a glass of wine in like 10 days! Ok, Fuck everything else for the weekend….my new goal is to buy 6 magnum bottles of wine and down them all in a 24 hour period and catch up on all my favortie blogs. The rest of life can kiss my ass because my liver and blog addiction takes precedent.




All my blogger buddies please say a prayer I kick ass in my interview…I really don’t want to have to give Blow jobs to get a job! Hehehe.

Why isn't it June?

So here are some pics (I love tripadvisor since they give real photos from travelers that have been there)of the amazing resort we are going to and on other news I have a phone interveiw with two companies in the next two weeks for a new job. Please say a prayer I need to get the fuck out of this cubicle!

Rooftop Jacuzzi area! SWEET!


Other part of resort


Gorgeous Scenery


Swim up bar and pool


Our bedroom (Hope once they find out we are honeymooners they will upgrade us?!)


Fire pits near rooftop jacuzzi

Razors are better than interviews!

So today is my interview…I am nervous but not too nervous. I am going to the “dentist” early today for the interview. I am nervous not because of the actual interview but more that I want the job so bad so I can get the hell out of here.

The main problem I have had with getting interviews is that I am basically changing careers. I would not be changing fields but my career within the field. I have been putting resume and cover letters to any and every company to try and so far I got one phone interview (decided I didn’t have enough experience) and this actual interview so I know this might be my only chance for a while. The new job would be a great start to a new year and I would get a new company care, corporate credit card, etc. The pay would be pretty much the same as I make now but I get way better bonuses each quarter if I make or exceed my goals.

As I prepare for this interview (hmm why did I chose the field of science again?) I think back to the two worst interviews of my life. Before I graduated grad school interviews had always been a breeze for me. Basically if I could get an interview I would get the job. Of course the jobs up to that point included waitress, marketing assistant, bartender and retail clerk. Not very impressive but my outgoing personality and success with such childish interviews gave me a bloated sense of confidence in the interviewing arena.

So when I got my first interview with Yale to be a research assistant I was excited and pretty much thought “hey how could they not want me?” HA believe me after this interview I could understand. I went in and the PhD dick head completely blindsided me with a chemistry test. What chemistry test on a fucking interview with no calculator? I completely froze and blanked. WORSE time ever to blank. I basically looked like a retard that couldn’t complete a math equation. He was particularly snide as he made it abundantly clear that I was an idiot. (Most PhD’s have a holier than god, I am king of the world complex) I couldn’t believe I fucked it up so much but realized it was best to have my first “real” interview go horribly wrong rather than a job I really wanted.

A couple more interviews my confidence grew. I would get further and further with a phone interview, then a first interview, but never got the job. I would prepare more and more for each new prospect. I then landed an interview for a state job with a lab and again felt prepared but not prepared enough. As I walked in I was greeted by two PhD’s who actually appeared nice and humble but after a few minutes of bullshit they brought be into a lab…to give me a practical. If you don’t know what a practical basically it is when you have to perform techniques (in my case lab techniques) with people watching and judging you. It is very intense and nerve wracking but what was worse apparently the lab had an issue with mold and had bleached the lab from top to bottom. The lab wrecked of bleach and it was so strong that paired with the stress of them watching me perform I almost PASSED out! Yup, gray in the face, short breaths, eyes in the back of the head, passed out. Do you have any idea how fucking embarrassing it is to be 24 and almost pass out. Luckily the rest of the interview went great, I even got a 90 on the timed math tes (with a calculator this time, hehe) and I really clicked with the guy who would be my boss. I actually made it to the third and final interview where I was told it was between me and one other guy. Turned out he knew more about botany than I (damn hippie, hehe JK).

In the end it turned out OK the job I have now paid about 15,000 dollars more a year and they had benefits. So today I want out of my current job but serio0usly cannot wait for the interview to be over with. Maybe I will be asked to swallow razors while saying the alphabet backwards? That truly does not seem so bad just as long as I get the fucking job! Say a prayer, sacrifice an animal, do anything so that I get this job!

I officially own a condo and it is adorable. After my lawyer/Uncle started yelling at my realtor at the closing everything was smooth sailing, hehe! We bought a flat screen 46 inch Aquos TV which S. wanted to make love to and moved everything in on Saturday. Can I tell you how much I love being a women on the those days. Its universally known for any man who is moving to get another man to help. I will help you open the doors and unpack but I am not about moving huge couches, tables and beds. Thank god for ovaries and men's outdated view that we are too weak to handle it. It works in my advantage and I am fine with that.

Basically all weekend we just spent unpacking and decorating. S. was amazing and is great with tools. He didn't complain once and the place is looking more and more like home. We have very different changes. I want to repaint the cabinets and refinish our bedroom set but besides that everything else is new. With that said having a whole new bathroom is the most amazing thing not only because of the obvious advantages but I CAN TAKE A BATH! I have not taken a fucking bath in over 4 years. I am not a crazy anal retentive clean person but there was no way I was laying in the bath where 4 guys clean their dirty feet and jerk off on a weekly basis. So today on my lunch break I am going to buy a really nice bubble bath to just soak. Ahhhh that might be as orgasmic as well.....a orgasm.

It feels so fabulous to own our own place for some reason it makes me feel more adult! I know I know that sounds retarded but at the same time it is true. Well back to pretending to be an adult.

P.S. Say a prayer I have an interview tomorrow...which means I am calling out of work to take the interview.

Love to be a woman except..

I will be honest that most days I love being a woman. I will never complain that men have it better (at least right now) than we do, especially being in my mid twenties. Life is crazy but being a somewhat attractive woman (I am cute more so than model) you can take advantage of a lot of things. Getting out of tickets, free drinks, etc. but there are a few times that I cannot stand being a woman. And that time is…..

The visit to the GYNO (as a dark errie sound plays in the back)

Where else can you be asked to place your vagina on full display to be poked and prodded at without even getting some drinks or dinner before!? Actually most times it is not too bad but today I had to have a little procedure done and sometimes I feel like the doctor is not really caring about how my cervix is feeling. Plus because of liability now there usually has to be more than just your doctor in the room. Ahhh soon they will tell me that they need eight doctors in their to help spread out the insurance costs they have. So I sit here at my desk popping Tylenol to help my cramps and think maybe I can speed home, cry my way out of a ticket and make myself feel like a sexy lady again?

P.S.: Oh and on a side note I can’t have any sex for a week! When mentioning this to S. he says “What, I need to have a chat with this doctor” as I am laughing I realized how he was trying to cheer me up. Sometimes he is really a great guy and knows how my sarcastic sense of perversion makes medical procedures not seem so serious.

P.S.S: I called back for the interview and lied that I was out of town on business but would love to set up an interview when I get back. AKA..need to stall so my system can clean out all the THC it collected from a cab driver. Damn you HR groups and taking forever to get back.

Hmm weekend and a possible interview!

OK so the weekend was once again a druken blur...hmmm I need to relax with the booze when you get yet another scrape and ruin your jeans and you have the following converstation with a cab driver (hey I was responsible and took one home).

Me: Hi, can you take me home to..... its off exit 26.
Cabbie: Ohh I brought you home last night didn't I?
Me: Oh shit yeah you did and you sold me that great weed and let me smoke in your cab, can I light up?
Cabbie: No problemo you can do whatever you want...you are so beautiful do you know that
(Side Note: I looked like a drunken mess)
Me: Ohhh thanks thats nice, just trying to get home.
Cabbie: You know what?
Me: What?
Cabbie: I will give you as much weed as you want and the ride for free if you give me one hour in a hotel room with you.
(Side note: Now most women would be offended by this but I could not help but laugh that he thinks that would be enough to convince me to sleep with him)
Me: Laughing so hard, Uhhhhh sorry I am not a hooker and I am a good girl, but thanks for the offer.
Cabbie: Are you sure?
Me: Hahha, yeah I am sure!
Cabbie: Well here have this anyways (hands me a marlboro pack)
Me: Ohhh thanks (I open it and it does not have ciggerettes rather a big bag of weed)
Me: Ohhh I can't pay for this and I am not going to sleep with you...
Cabbie: Ohhh don't worry about it, just take it.
Me: I repeat I am not going to sleep with you for anything
Cabbie: It's not a problem just take it.
Me: I AM NOT GOING TO SLEEP with you
Cabbie: No I know, don't worry
Me: Uhh ok (as I stuble out of the cab, throw a 20 at him and bolt)

As I get into my apartment I just about fell over thinking I was just given a free bg for nothing but I was also apparently so hooker looking after drinking all night that someone thought I was, hehe! Maybe its a sign from god that I either need to stop drinking or hookers get alot of great perks. Need to ponder over that?

On my professional forefront I got a call back for an interveiw for a job that I applied for like 4 months ago. WHAT the fuck why do big companies post jobs for ever but take forever to answer. Oh well I am going to set one up to see if I can get more moeny out of them. Updates will follow as for now i will pretend to work as an engineer and start bartedning my weekends away (hmm maybe I should look into being a hooker, hehehe)