Razors are better than interviews!

So today is my interview…I am nervous but not too nervous. I am going to the “dentist” early today for the interview. I am nervous not because of the actual interview but more that I want the job so bad so I can get the hell out of here.

The main problem I have had with getting interviews is that I am basically changing careers. I would not be changing fields but my career within the field. I have been putting resume and cover letters to any and every company to try and so far I got one phone interview (decided I didn’t have enough experience) and this actual interview so I know this might be my only chance for a while. The new job would be a great start to a new year and I would get a new company care, corporate credit card, etc. The pay would be pretty much the same as I make now but I get way better bonuses each quarter if I make or exceed my goals.

As I prepare for this interview (hmm why did I chose the field of science again?) I think back to the two worst interviews of my life. Before I graduated grad school interviews had always been a breeze for me. Basically if I could get an interview I would get the job. Of course the jobs up to that point included waitress, marketing assistant, bartender and retail clerk. Not very impressive but my outgoing personality and success with such childish interviews gave me a bloated sense of confidence in the interviewing arena.

So when I got my first interview with Yale to be a research assistant I was excited and pretty much thought “hey how could they not want me?” HA believe me after this interview I could understand. I went in and the PhD dick head completely blindsided me with a chemistry test. What chemistry test on a fucking interview with no calculator? I completely froze and blanked. WORSE time ever to blank. I basically looked like a retard that couldn’t complete a math equation. He was particularly snide as he made it abundantly clear that I was an idiot. (Most PhD’s have a holier than god, I am king of the world complex) I couldn’t believe I fucked it up so much but realized it was best to have my first “real” interview go horribly wrong rather than a job I really wanted.

A couple more interviews my confidence grew. I would get further and further with a phone interview, then a first interview, but never got the job. I would prepare more and more for each new prospect. I then landed an interview for a state job with a lab and again felt prepared but not prepared enough. As I walked in I was greeted by two PhD’s who actually appeared nice and humble but after a few minutes of bullshit they brought be into a lab…to give me a practical. If you don’t know what a practical basically it is when you have to perform techniques (in my case lab techniques) with people watching and judging you. It is very intense and nerve wracking but what was worse apparently the lab had an issue with mold and had bleached the lab from top to bottom. The lab wrecked of bleach and it was so strong that paired with the stress of them watching me perform I almost PASSED out! Yup, gray in the face, short breaths, eyes in the back of the head, passed out. Do you have any idea how fucking embarrassing it is to be 24 and almost pass out. Luckily the rest of the interview went great, I even got a 90 on the timed math tes (with a calculator this time, hehe) and I really clicked with the guy who would be my boss. I actually made it to the third and final interview where I was told it was between me and one other guy. Turned out he knew more about botany than I (damn hippie, hehe JK).

In the end it turned out OK the job I have now paid about 15,000 dollars more a year and they had benefits. So today I want out of my current job but serio0usly cannot wait for the interview to be over with. Maybe I will be asked to swallow razors while saying the alphabet backwards? That truly does not seem so bad just as long as I get the fucking job! Say a prayer, sacrifice an animal, do anything so that I get this job!

Closeted blogger

I realized I am a closeted Blogger.


(Remember when Tom Cruise was in the closet on south Park? Love that shit!"

I feel this "closetness" is necessary so that I can write and express everything and anything. I can be as crazy, hurtful, outspoken or retarded as I want. I found out how it might feel to be exposed as well. ONE WORD (ok well two)

FUCKING SCARY!

A good girlfriend of mine emailed me to catch up since we do not talk on a regular basis and she mentioned my blog. What was going on after she read my blog….MY WHAT! MY WHAT! How the fuck does anyone, I mean anyone know about my blog. My head starts to spin as beads of sweat fall down. What have I written over the last 100 posts, would she know about the people, me, etc? Oh my god, oh my god! I asked her calmly, as pit stains were starting to develop, where did you find it? Her response….Uhh on Myspace silly. Whoooo a stroke of relief flushes my body. She has not found out your secret, your craziness, and most importantly your blogging identity.

I didn’t think it would affect me that much to have someone know about my blog, but truly I have told no one, not even S. about it. I feel if I do I would have to censor or restrain myself. I need this place for the complete opposite of that. I don’t mind people I don’t know seeing this but people I do know might start to look at me differently if not feel hurt from this blog. Let’s face it nobody wants to know what people, even close loving people, think about you all the time. We all have our flaws and even though I love the close people in my life they annoy, hurt, anger me sometime or another as well as I do the same to them. I can hear my mom say “I love you QG but I just don’t like you right now” which is so true. Life is full of up and downs with the people you love (lets face it I probably wouldn’t care otherwise), but this place is my sanctuary and I do not want anyone I know to know about it.

Onto other news….the condo is looking fabulous (just felt like a hot gay man when I said that) and it is getting near perfection. Worked on the custom floating shelves S made me (he is so hot when he builds things) and it is going to look somethign like this but black.



I took the long awaited bath and it was nice. The funny thing is I remember baths being a lot bigger. Guess my 5’10 frame doesn’t help me in that area anymore.

To date S. and I have christened the living room floor, couch, dining table, bed and shower. Next should be kitchen and hallway (JK or am I). For some reason I can’t help but want to walk around naked all the time…which turns S on and then he attacks me.

Note: to people having sex issues, just walk around naked doing everyday things, and confident…this will put vagina and sexual organs in man’s view which renders them helpless.

I need some ass pushing so I go to the gym; I have been horrible since moving in. I have become obsessed with the condo and working on it until it is finished so I do not have to worry about it later. This normally is no big deal except Halloween and my slutty outfit is coming up soon and I do not need to look like a lard ass.