Ambien is the best for me and my hubby....

Life it good, really good right now! Made it through first year of marriage and haven't killed him yet and vice versa, hehehe! Although I have found a new love that makes for a perfect triangle in my marriage. AMBIEN CR!

I for years have been an insomniac and light sleeper....seriously I have had to use ear plugs my whole life and still wake up. SOOOOO every once in a while I will pop an Ambien CR. Well let me tell you an incident occur ed that made my husband love it even more and not because I was well rested in the morning.

One night I was out with my coworker and we partied it up, had a blast but by the time I got home I was pretty blasted (hehehe, like my play on words, lame I know) and I took a Ambien CR. Well few minutes later the sleepiness kicks in and the last thing I remember is walking into the bedroom and taking my clothes off to jump into bed. Woke up refreshed and a little hung over but overall great. I work, run errands and then come home. The following conversation ensues as I walk through the door to my husband....

H: You were such a dirty girl last night (with a huge grin)
Me: What are you talking about?
H: You were so hot last night! I have never heard you talk like that ever!?
Me: We had sex last night? (totally confused)
H: No, you gave me the most mind blowing 45 minute blow job ever and the shit that came out of your mouth! Ha, I can't even repeat it....
Me: What the fuck are you talking about, I don't remember any of it
H starts laughing alot
H: You don't remember it????
Me: You are so lying...that never happened
H: Swear on my families life...you talked worse than a porn star crack whore who hadn't had a hit in two days...
Me: No shit....wish I could remember any of it
H: We guess we must dub you the "PHANTOM SUCKER"
Me: It must have been Ambien I took last night, side effects are memory lost
H: And sucking mad dick????
Me: apparently.....
H: Do we have more Ambien I think it should be a nightly thing.....

So far that has only happened once, guess it's no surprise that I don't do anything like sleep walk, drive a car, etc.....I am the slut who talks like a porn star and sucks a mean dick.

HOLY SHIT!

I know I am the worst blogger ever, and there is no one to blame but myself. Soooo lets try and sum up the last 5 months. Started my new whiz bangy job which I love. I am a legal drg dealer who wines and dines medical professionals (I have lots of great fucked up stories to come...). I also got married which was great and it went so well and was a blast (lots of stories too) and still have a tendency to drink to much.
I still have the quarterlife craziness, hmmm all of a sudden I have become a baby machine or should be because to my parents there is absolutely no other reason to get married. My new name should be Mrs. Resistant to become a breeding machine just yet. Luckily my sister just got pregnant so that should hold them off for a while. I mean really what other parents besides irish catholics are asking you a month before you walk down the aisle when you are getting knocked up (after they offer you a drink). My response is " I have spent this long not trying to get pregnant and I would like to drink at my wedding?"
Lots of drama with the friends which will dedicate whole blogs for each of them. Luckily and knock on wood I have no craziness as of now. Family good, Husband good (sounds way to weird and almost snooty to say that shit) and work is good. I am holding my breath that this will last since I have never had happiness in all three at once ever. THANK you for that right now. I will be better about keeping up with this since I miss all of my bloggers!

What is the deal?

So I get home from work last night and actually saw my roommate (we’ll call Sharon) whom has been MIA since she has a new man. Do not get me wrong Sharon is one of my true best friends who was definitely there for me with this whole crazy breakup, back together, breakup limbo crap situation I have with S. She was the true friend who dropped everything and invited me out because she knows how I don’t deal with my own thoughts very well.
On the topic of friends it is crazy how you realize who are true friends and those who are convenient fun friends when you go through something like this. I was surprised because I have some friends whom have been there before when I was falling apart but now really are not. To the point where I ask myself why am I friends with them. My main problem is I am classified as a giver. Our couples counselor (S. and I even tried that) told me that I am too much of a giver to my friends and family and constantly do not put myself first. So when I fall apart (which happens maybe once every two years) and I do not receive the same emotional support I give makes me fall deeper into depression, if not angers me. It was crazy to hear him say you have to stop being the giver or else you will burn out by the time you are 35. I have such issues with this…..why do I have to stop caring about people and giving? Treat others as you would be treated? Am I naïve to this my friends of ten years or more can do that? Apparently now that they are married or in a Long term relationship it is. The bizarre thing is that even though S. and I were together for almost 4 years (not really sure what we are now) I never once not included my friends or flat out dropped everything for them when they needed it (especially with the matters of the heart). Dammit the stress of this is the last thing I need. So the question is do I change my ways to become another selfish person in the sea of many (firm belief that the whole change of taking care of yourself first all the time, etc is the reason that divorce is so high, sometimes it is valid and sometimes not) or do I continue to be who I am (guess coming from a large, strong loving family made me that way) and realize that people will not change and accept them for who they are?

P.S.: S. texted me how he wishes I was there because he was doing laundry and we used to do it together (kind of a ritual)…hmmm is that a compliment or do you not like to fold? What is the deal with this man…..